Monthly Archives: December 2015

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At the Gate of the Solstice

Nature is not caught up in all the hustle & bustle that happens at this time of the year...she has gone quiet, deep & restful.  The stark beauty of winter has Her stripped bare.  Her strength, beauty & wisdom is embraced in the arms of the earth where She's renewing, designing & gathering Herself for the anticipation of all the new that is coming. You too can take a moment at the Solstice to go deep & sit with your inner self in quiet wisdom of the stark winter.  It is the beginning of the new cycle.  It's where we begin to gather the energies for our next cycle.  In this quiet time we begin to birth it. I love to gather with close friends on the glittering evening of the Winter Solstice around the fire & light a candle as I reflect on the retreating year & all the potentials of the coming one.  Sometimes I write lists of what I want to release, renew & embrace on this night.  In a few weeks more I will start to make a more specific plans for the coming year. The 2015 Solstice is on Monday December 21 at 8:48pm (Pacific Daylight Time) or Tuesday, December 22, 2015 at 04:49 UTC.  And for many of you reading this it may be the Summer Solstice if you are in the Southern Hemisphere.  But for me, here in the lush moist landscape of the Pacific Northwest it is definitely the Winter Solstice.  (I find it always interesting the yin & yang nature of our World.) At the about 1o minutes before & after the specific time, I intend to sit in reflection & offer to sync my own personal cycle with the inherent natural rhythms of our Mother Gaia.  I will ask that [...]

this boss lady made unwise choices

Cranky. Snappy. Mean. Depressed. Angry. Emotions I was choosing to let run the show. Did I have 'good' reasons for choosing these emotions? Possibly.  Did I feel I had choice back then?  Absolutely NOT! I was the boss lady of a busy restaurant.  With all the staff issues, long hours, long weeks, instant drama & over-indulgent habits & patterns that typically go hand in hand with this biz. I managed to pull out more appropriate emotions & behaviors most of the time.  I found the energy I needed from somewhere deep down to show up & get the job done.  But even that source began to get harder & harder to tap.  It was running dry from the constant use & no replenishment.  So the 'bad' stuff crept up more often...and  I used more excuses & indulgences to cope with it. Sounds a bit manic, doesn't it? Looking back it was.  I was. BUT I've so much compassion & love for that person.  She did her best at the time, she taught me a ton & she was 'good' at the job. But as you can see...I didn't FEEL good.  I was tired, stressed, achy beyond my years, no energy & no way to refill my well- to dig out- to get back on top of it.  To be me. One of my big A-Ha's around this issue of choosing to act on emotions like this is that I began to hear myself tell myself excuses for the bad behavior towards others or myself.  For example, if I was cranky with someone I would hear myself say, 'You did that because you're not feeling well.'  Or 'I haven't eaten yet, so I have a right to act like that."  Or 'I haven't had a day off in 10 days, so [...]